180. Rampage; movie review
Cert 12A
107 mins
BBFC advice: Contains moderate violence, threat, brief gory images, rude gestures
And the Geostorm award for the biggest mess of a movie for 2018 could well go to... Rampage.
Three years ago, I wrote of Brad Peyton's last movie: "And the candidate for most expensive turkey of the year goes to... San Andreas.
"Pretty much everything about it is preposterous poppycock."
Ditto Rampage. It is just as big and just as crass and, once again, it has Dwayne 'The Rock' Johnson as an action hero.
The premise of Rampage is even more off-the-wall than that of San Andreas.
Its concept surrounds an explosion on a space station which means experimental chemical composites fall to earth.
The gasses are breathed in by an alligator, a wolf and an albino gorilla which can communicate, via sign language, with an animal sanctuary boss.
Yep, The Rock has become Doctor Dolittle - complete with the ability to joke with aforementioned gorilla.
However, this becomes a tad trickier after the ape has sniffed the space gas and has suddenly grown by several feet outward and upward.
Indeed, it causes the red mists of anger to descend as it does on the now-giant alligator and wolf.
So, The Rock and his sidekick (Naomie Harris) set out to save the world from the mega-sized animals and two pantomime baddies in the shape of ruthless business owners (Jake Lacy and Malin Akerman).
The whole premise appears to be an excuse for Peyton to resume playing with his special effects kit and see how much destruction of tall buildings his budget can run to.
The answer is a lot - not to mention helicopters, planes and anything else which comes within a street-long distance of aforementioned giant animals.
Meanwhile, the backdrop remains the bro-mance between The Rock and a giant white gorilla.
I don't know what the only other person in Nottingham Cineworld's IMAX thought of Rampage but I was left in a state of bewilderment as to how it is topping the UK box office chart.
Reasons to watch: If you like to watch buildings smashed to smithereens
Reasons to avoid: A giant mess of a movie
Laughs: None
Jumps: None
Vomit: None
Nudity: None
Overall rating: 3/10
The premise of Rampage is even more off-the-wall than that of San Andreas.
Its concept surrounds an explosion on a space station which means experimental chemical composites fall to earth.
The gasses are breathed in by an alligator, a wolf and an albino gorilla which can communicate, via sign language, with an animal sanctuary boss.
Yep, The Rock has become Doctor Dolittle - complete with the ability to joke with aforementioned gorilla.
However, this becomes a tad trickier after the ape has sniffed the space gas and has suddenly grown by several feet outward and upward.
Indeed, it causes the red mists of anger to descend as it does on the now-giant alligator and wolf.
So, The Rock and his sidekick (Naomie Harris) set out to save the world from the mega-sized animals and two pantomime baddies in the shape of ruthless business owners (Jake Lacy and Malin Akerman).
The whole premise appears to be an excuse for Peyton to resume playing with his special effects kit and see how much destruction of tall buildings his budget can run to.
The answer is a lot - not to mention helicopters, planes and anything else which comes within a street-long distance of aforementioned giant animals.
Meanwhile, the backdrop remains the bro-mance between The Rock and a giant white gorilla.
I don't know what the only other person in Nottingham Cineworld's IMAX thought of Rampage but I was left in a state of bewilderment as to how it is topping the UK box office chart.
Reasons to watch: If you like to watch buildings smashed to smithereens
Reasons to avoid: A giant mess of a movie
Laughs: None
Jumps: None
Vomit: None
Nudity: None
Overall rating: 3/10
Director statement - Brad Peyton: "The movie is about trust and friendship and we focus a lot on that dynamic."
The big question - Why are audiences lured in by buildings being smashed up?
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