338. Show Dogs; movie review

SHOW DOGS
Cert PG
90 mins

BBFC advice: Contains mild bad language, rude humour, violence

There will be those of you out their who go ga-ga over their pets and, therefore, movies such as Beverley Hills Chihuahua and Show Dogs will make the less discerning cinema-goers laugh.
But is there really such a big audience for talking pooches that movies like this have to dominate schedules every summer?
Show Dogs is so banal that I would have expected a four-year-old to hold their nose to indicate a stinker.
But perhaps I overestimate them and their guardians because it has made nearly $40m from a $5.5m budget.
For the record, Will Arnett stars as a detective who is on the trail of a stolen baby panda and a lead inspires him a prestigious dog show.
Chris "Ludacris" Bridges provides voice for Max, a Rottweiler police dog who is assigned to the reluctant cop.

It transpires that Max can talk and be understood by other animals but not by humans.
Therefore, he cannot explain to his partner when he wants to go off-piste to nail the bad guys.
Max is very much an Alpha male who protests vigorously and being preened as a dog show competitor.
If I were him I would be more concerned at the film-makers' apparent obsession with his genitalia.
This has caused controversy among parents who clearly didn't expect a waxing job inside his tail nor the regular touching of his privates.
Indeed, such has been the furore that one of the offending scenes have been cut.
Actually, I am pretty sure they would go over the heads of children but they do pose the question of why they were deemed necessary.
Overall, I was more offended by just how lazy Raja Gosnell's film is - the same old, lame old canines-are-more-clever than humans undertone as well as cliches about a misunderstood hero dog (see every episode of Scooby Doo).
Or perhaps it's me and I need to reboot my inner child.

Reasons to watch: If you are a dog owner
Reasons to avoid: If you are not a dog owner or discernible cinema-goer

Laughs: One
Jumps: None
Vomit: None
Nudity: None
Overall rating: 3.5/10

The big question - Why do grown-ups make such poor children's movies?

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